


Soaring Away

by Phirim



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, F/F, angst with happy ending, fifth route with focus on edeleth, listen always expect angst with me ok
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2020-09-28 21:07:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20432450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phirim/pseuds/Phirim
Summary: Intent on resolving her emperor's lingering regrets, Byleth went through all the different routes to gather her information. Now she's ready to put that information to use to try and find a happy ending for Edelgard, and all her other students.





	1. Again

_“I wish I could have stayed...back in those peaceful days…”_

_“I wanted...to walk with you...”_

“Hey. Time to wake up.”

Tear filled eyes opened to an unfamiliar ceiling. Byleth took a breath, and then another, as she grounded herself in her new reality. Here she was, once again.

_“It’s finally time. How long are you going to lay there?”_

Sothis. Her anchor to sanity after all this time. Byleth sat up and wiped her eyes as Jeralt called out for her again, “Come on, we’ve got a job.” 

Byleth quickly got ready, slipping into her mask of neutrality as she went. When she’d first met Sothis, it was less of a mask, but as she went through timeline after timeline, experiencing anguish after anguish, keeping her face as neutral as it had been had become difficult to do. 

With a deep breath to steel herself, Byleth left the small village home they had stayed the night in, and began what she hoped would be the last timeline. 

“Had that dream again?” Jeralt asked as she appeared. 

Byleth looked at him for a moment, memories of his inevitable death flooding her thoughts. Fate was a funny thing. No matter how hard she struggled, some events were just fixed in time, unable to be changed. His death proved to be one of those, finding a way to happen regardless of her attempts to save him. She looked away, choosing to focus instead on the floor as she gave the answer she had grown accustomed to giving every time.

“Yeah, wish I could do something about that.” He responded, rubbing the back of his neck, “Anyway, our next job is in the kingdom, so we’d better get on our way.”

As expected, once they left the small home, they were met by scrambled mercs and three colorful students. Jeralt addressed them, and Byleth tuned him out, observing her future students. They were only kids, bickering among themselves with no idea of the horrors that awaited them. All three of them, destined to be stabbed clean through by fate itself. Destined to fall to their knees, to madness, to darkness, to each other. As her chest grew tighter, she turned away abruptly, and began to head towards the site of the upcoming battle. Sothis remained silent, a slight relief. Seeing them as they were...knowing everything she now knows...it felt like a kick in the throat. Byleth narrowed her focus to her surroundings, to the cold steel of her blade resting in her hands, to the gentle breeze shifting her hair, to the solid ground beneath her feet. She couldn’t let the swarm of grief swimming in her head take over, she had to be stronger. Stronger than grief, stronger than fear, stronger than dread, and stronger than fate itself. 

_“We have a plan. We know each of those kids better than they know themselves right now. If anyone can bring them all together, it’s you.”_

Sothis. Byleth nodded in response, smiling slightly as her nerves began to settle. It was because of Sothis that she had made it this far, that she hadn’t shattered from the weight of the darkness pushing down on her. She heard the sound of footsteps behind her, and turned to find her three students standing by, awaiting instructions. 

“Your father advised us to follow your command. You’re a mercenary, so show me what you can do.” Edelgard said, looking Byleth square in the eye, her chin tilted upward slightly. Byleth met her gaze for a moment, dark blue to lavender. In her bright eyes, she found the love of her life. The one who brought her so much happiness, all those lifetimes ago. And at last, she could see those eyes reflect that happiness once again. She couldn’t help but give a smile, much to the confusion of the future emperor. Yes, perhaps darkness was all around her, waiting for the chance to suffocate her from the inside out, but even so, she was with the woman she loved, albeit a younger version. Her stubborn pride, her natural confidence in the way she carried herself, the way she projected her presence enough that it was easy to forget just how small she really was, such were qualities Byleth had fallen in love with, and simply adored. 

_“Okay okay, let’s put a pin in the gay and go beat up the bandits again, you useless lesbian.”_ Sothis sighed.

Byleth’s smile grew. ““I’ll gladly show you my skills, my lady.” She responded, throwing the young emperor a quick wink to top it off. Just as Edelgard was about to give a flustered retort, she turned and advanced, throwing orders behind her for the others to follow. By now, she could maneuver through this specific battle with her eyes closed. Quite literally, as she didn’t often actually look where she was sending the young royals. They followed her orders perfectly, as they always did, and it wasn’t long before very few bandits were left standing. 

As if on cue, Edelgard bent to retrieve her axe, and Kostas surged forward with intent to kill. Byleth was immediately by Edelgard’s side, sword drawn and prepared. She parried the bandit leader’s axe, sending it flying out of his hands, and forcing him to angrily withdraw, as per usual. No divine pulse necessary. She turned to Edelgard, who was looking at her like she’d had her gay awakening. A look that held a mixture of awe and adrenaline that left her flushed and breathless. “Did my skills meet your expectations, my lady?”

Edelgard noticeably swallowed before answering, “Yes...you’ve exceeded them, honestly. I owe my life to you.”

_“She owes us so many lives.”_ Sothis chimed in, prompting Byleth to smile. 

“You owe your life to none but yourself. I simply did as I wished.” 

It wasn’t long before she heard Alois arrive, and the other two royals approached her, almost vibrating with the amount of questions they had for her. As Dimitri began his usual recruitment speech, she could see the gears in Edelgard’s mind turning as she thought about her words, and came to her own conclusion.

“Your skills would be well appreciated in the service of the Empire.” She blurted out, interrupting Dimitri’s own recruitment attempt. She blinked as she realized her interruption, and Byleth could see the hint of a blush on her cheeks. Byleth chuckled, knowing full well Edelgard had been lost in her own thoughts, and wasn’t following the conversation.

“Hold, Edelgard. Let me finish my own offer.” Dimitri said, taking the interruption with grace. “Your skills would be well utilized as a knight of the Kingdom, and I would like to offer you a position as such.”

“Geez guys, I was going to be polite and wait to bring it up naturally in conversation, but since this has turned into a recruitment fest, might as well throw my hat in the ring too.” Claude added, putting his hands behind his head. “You, Me, Alliance, could be magical.” 

“...That was a terrible pitch.” Edelgard commented, her moment of embarrassment having passed. “Are you trying to recruit her, or woo her?”

“Both.” Claude answered, giving Byleth a flirty wink. Byleth chuckled at Edelgard’s bothered frown, and simply ruffled Claude’s hair, ruining his whole groove. 

“Come on children, it seems we’ll all be heading back to your monastery.” Byleth said, leading the bickering students to join with her father and Alois. The walk was going to be long, but that was perfectly fine with Byleth. She needed that time to prepare. Dread began to settle in her gut once more as she thought of her upcoming meeting with Rhea. She'd tried to ignore her rising conflict regarding the woman, but she would have to confront it soon. Was Rhea someone she wanted to save as well? Byleth had yet to decide.


	2. Turmoil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A talk with Edelgard, confronting Rhea, and a decision that could change everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry It's taken so long, I'm a nerd and procrastinate lol. Hope you enjoy!

Garreg Mach. The center of everything, and the only place that felt like home. Byleth tucked a bit of stray hair behind her ear, taking in how the sunlight seemed to make the stone walls sparkle. A strong sense of longing swept over her, and she found herself thinking back to the first time she wandered around its twisting grounds, attempting to remember where everything was. It’d been so long since then. She was essentially a different person now. Whether that was a good thing or not had yet to be seen.

“There it is. Garreg Mach, and the Officer’s Academy.” Edelgard stated, coming to a stop by her side.

“It’s quite beautiful,” Byleth said, turning her gaze to Edelgard. “But I get the sense it’s full of depth few have quite comprehended.”

“Oh?” Edelgard replied, her eyebrow rising in likely either intrigue or confusion, “That’s an interesting thought. Care to elaborate?”

“Places are a lot like people, in a way.” Byleth folded her hands behind her, and met the younger girl’s eyes, tilting her head slightly as she continued, “For example, I’ve only just seen Garreg Mach, and only just met you. Both are beautiful, and both undoubtedly hold an amount of depth that is carefully guarded and known to very few. From this surface encounter, I don’t know much about either. If one can be split into the many perspectives of others, what, then is the truth of one’s being? Is it an amalgamation of all these perspectives, or perhaps it is something completely unique, that can only be revealed by the one in question?” 

With a quick spin of her heel, Byleth continued forward once again, waiting until she heard Edelgard’s briefly delayed steps catch up with hers. “It’s my opinion that you can never know a place, or know someone completely, until you reach out your hand and listen closely to what they leave unspoken. I wonder, if someone were to reach out their hand to you, would you reach out right back?”

She glanced over to her favorite student, who had her brow furrowed. “I-” Edelgard began, but Byleth simply shook her head.

“No need to give an answer, I’m speaking hypothetically, after all.” 

The rest of the walk to the interior was spent conversing with Dimitri and Claude, enthusiastically asking about her past jobs and achievements. She may have mixed in a couple things that were yet to happen, but really, as long as Jeralt couldn’t hear and object, who would be the wiser? As expected, Sothis chimed in to suggest telling them about the time they fought a dragon, and Edelgard remained silently deep in thought, oblivious to the idle chit chat around her.

“It’s Rhea. Great.” Jeralt grumbled. The walk through the grounds had gone by quicker than expected, it seemed. Byleth lifted her eyes to meet those of the Immaculate One, looking down on them from above and framed by sunlight in a way that made her appear ethereal. They held each others’ gazes for a beat, and then another. The air felt heavy with tension, tightness settled into Byleth’s chest. Another beat, and then they were inside, out of her field of vision. Byleth let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, forcibly attempting to seem more lax than she really was. If she hadn’t been swirling with anxiety over the woman before, seeing her face to face again would have certainly done it. She almost wished Sothis would interrupt with a silly quip, or offer up her opinion as she did for most things, but the goddess remained silent. It’s not as if she could be blamed either, surely her own feelings were in just as much turmoil over the matter. 

“Listen, kiddo.” Jeralt whispered, “I know she’s the archbishop and all, but be careful around Rhea, okay? She’s got to be up to something.” Byleth nodded, her throat feeling as though she were being strangled. Once again, Rhea stood before her, desperation and longing hidden expertly behind a gentle smile. 

“Thank you for your patience, Jeralt. I am Seteth, advisor to the archbishop.” 

Seteth and Jeralt faded into background noise as dark clouds enveloped Byleth’s mind. She couldn’t break her gaze away from Rhea, conflicting memories of betrayal, of hatred, of love, of parenthood, all crashing into one another like wild waves of a stormy sea. Sothis’s memories and feelings, and her own memories and feelings, were both soaked in indecision. 

“Are you alright, dear?” Byleth blinked, realizing all eyes were on her. Rhea wore a worried expression. She must have zoned out too far to notice she was being addressed. 

Taking a shaky breath, Byleth quickly tried to gather herself. “...Yes, my apologies. I was simply...overwhelmed. I’m afraid I’m not used to such large places.” She lied through her teeth.

Rhea’s features softened, and she placed a comforting hand on Byleth’s shoulder, to which Byleth had to use all her self control to keep from tensing at. “I understand your fears, but I hope Garreg Mach can, in time, feel like a second home for you. Should you need any help accommodating, please, do not hesitate to come to me.”

“O-Okay…” Byleth squeaked, begging Sothis to let this interaction end already.

As Rhea removed her hand, Byleth could feel Jeralt’s eyes on her. “Come on, kiddo. Let’s head to the captain’s quarters for a bit, yeah?” Byleth could only nod as he excused them, and led her away. Once certain they were alone, Jeralt turned to her, worry evident in his face. “You doing alright, hun? I don’t remember a time I’ve seen you so rattled.”

Byleth sighed, rubbing her arms absentmindedly. “Yeah, it’s just nerves is all.”

“Bullshit.” Byleth looked up sharply. Jeralt had never called her out so blatantly before. “That was genuine fear back there, and I know for a fact I’ve never seen that expression on you till now. Spill.”

“Look, I…” Byleth frowned. She couldn’t exactly explain why she’d been frozen to the spot like that without revealing too much. The other times she’d been in Rhea’s presence had been simple, she didn’t have to feel anything if she knew she was going to reset it all in the end. This time, however, was supposed to be the last. Confronting the feelings she’d been suppressing for multiple timelines had been more overwhelming than she’d expected.

_ “Why not tell him?” _ Sothis offered suddenly, _ “If we can’t save him, then why waste what should be our final timeline pretending with him?” _

As Byleth looked into her father’s concerned eyes, the grief of his past deaths washed over her anew. Sothis had a point.

“Dad...I have something I’d like to...let you in on.”


	3. Familiarity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth continues to be haunted by memories as the past as she eases back into beginning life at Garreg Mach all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Hope you enjoy.

“So that’s how it is, huh?”

“How in the hell are you taking this so well?”

Jeralt blinked. Byleth had just told him she’d lived through multiple timelines and he’d just accepted that at face value. She had been expecting disbelief, reproach, even confusion, but he just looked at her as if she’d merely stated she was going to the bathroom.

“Well, I figure you’ve gotta just take life as it comes.”

“And...you believe me? Why?”

“Well first of all, my daughter doesn't  _ squeak _ .” He laughed, much to Byleth’s chagrin. “And you express yourself more freely, almost like you’re a whole different person.” He continued. 

Byleth frowned. He wasn’t exactly wrong. She likely wouldn’t recognize herself if she saw the version of her from her original timeline.

“Honestly, you think I wouldn’t believe my precious daughter?” He joked, “I thought I raised you better than that, kiddo.”

Byleth cracked a grin at that, “Oh yes, says the dad that never kept track of my age.” She retorted.

“Ouch, you wound me!” He exclaimed, gripping his chest in mock pain.

Unfortunately, the motion had an adverse effect. Memories of all the times he gripped his chest in that same way, but with blood flowing between his fingers as he died in her arms, rushed back to the forefront of her mind. She could feel the cold rain pelting her from above, the chill that had settled in her bones, the tears running down her face, the weight of him limp in her arms. 

“..ddo?”

His lifeless eyes just stared up at the heavens, at the falling raindrops, her falling teardrops. She had closed his eyes, hadn’t she? But that visual. That visual of his eyes. It never went away. His eyes that used to be so warm and loving, now devoid of anything. Blank. Lifeless. Alone.

“Kiddo?”

“Hey, kiddo, where’d you go?”

A sharp breath brought her back to reality, or,  _ this _ reality, anyway. She quickly wiped at her welling tears, turning away to hide her face. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay hun, I’m here.” Jeralt soothed, moving closer and wrapping her in a strong hug.

How was she supposed to stop crying when he went and did  _ that _ ?

For the first time in longer than she cared to remember, Byleth allowed herself to break down, if only for a moment. She’d have to finish filling him in later, since her tears rudely interrupted the conversation, she supposed. 

_ “This is your time now. We’ll make it your time. So feel your feelings properly. You’re home.” _

-

Byleth had spent the night in Jeralt’s quarters, unwilling to leave his side just yet. He’d smoothed things over with Rhea and the others, giving the excuse that she’d been overwhelmed by the amount of social interaction, and would meet with them again the next day. 

Now was that time. Byleth was thankful to have gotten some time to rest, but now she had to move forward once more. It was time to properly face Rhea.

“Ah, Byleth, welcome.” Rhea gave her that same serene smile, the one that never quite reached her eyes. She was calculating, evaluating. Byleth stood a little straighter in response. 

_ “You don’t have to pretend to be straight, you know. You never were very good at that.”  _ Sothis teased. Byleth only narrowed her eyes slightly in response, not wanting to lose focus while under Rhea’s scrutiny. She could appreciate the attempt to diffuse the tension, however.

“I’m sure you’ve been told, but I have taken an interest in you and your skills as a mercenary.” Rhea began, “I would like to offer you a position as a professor at the Officer’s Academy, once you’re comfortable here, of course.” 

Byleth merely nodded, but that movement alone seemed to make Rhea’s smile widen slightly, and bring a bit of light to her eyes. Rhea had always been like that, no matter the timeline. Whenever Byleth cooperated with even the smallest things, it would seem to bring her a happiness she rarely expressed otherwise. It was...a little unsettling. But also endearing? Emotions regarding Rhea were always complicated, always two-sided. She was like a coin that was constantly being flipped.

“That being said,” She continued, “I’d like to ease you into life here at the monastery, so why don’t you spend today getting familiar with Garreg Mach and your potential students? You can pick which house you’d like to instruct after getting to know the students in them.”

“Very well.” Byleth answered, preparing to leave.

“Ah, before you go…” Rhea started. Byleth hesitantly turned back to her, walls rising even higher.

“Please, I do hope you’ll try to enjoy yourself. I genuinely wish for you to think of Garreg Mach as a second home.”

Byleth nodded again and gave an awkward smile before leaving. She could tell Rhea meant what she said, but as always, the feelings behind her words were left hidden behind her peaceful mask. 

Upon entering the reception hall, she was greeted by familiar lily white hair, waiting for her at the other end of the room. “Pity you’ll be accepting a position here. I would have preferred to add your strength in support of the Empire.” Edelgard said as Byleth approached. “Perhaps you’ll end up teaching the Black Eagles…” 

Byleth kept her face carefully neutral, but she doubted she could hide the affection in her eyes. “It’s certainly a possibility.” She agreed.

“Well, Professor…” Edelgard began. “I’ll leave you to familiarize yourself with the academy. I do hope to see you at dinner tonight, however. I’d like to further discuss your philosophies...they intrigue me.”

Byleth found herself lingering on how Edelgard addressed her as ‘professor’ for a bit longer than necessary. Oh, how she longed to hear her say ‘my professor’ again...It’d been too long. Several timelines too long, in fact. “Of course.” She said aloud, unable to keep the small smile off her face, “I’d like to hear your thoughts as well. That is, if you’d be willing to share them with me.”

“Certainly.” Edelgard agreed, smiling back.

As Byleth turned to make her way to the academy, she could feel Edelgard’s eyes on her back, evaluating her, studying her. She couldn’t help but shudder slightly, remembering countless times she felt that same gaze follow her out of a room for very different reasons. Unfortunately there were still many years before that would be a common occurance again. 

Meeting with the other house leaders went as it usually did, but due to her many timelines of experience, she was able to mingle with the other students a bit  _ too  _ well. Currently members from all three houses were arguing amongst each other for her attention, all wanting to get to know her at the same time. Some of the loudest voices were those of Dorothea, Sylvain, and Ingrid, though Ingrid was mostly trying to reign in Sylvain. As they argued back and forth, Byleth let herself zone out for the moment. Not being able to share her had always been the problem, hadn’t it? By picking one class, she was never able to fully bond with the others. Maybe Rhea’s favoritism could be useful for something, this time. 

Byleth was brought back to the commotion around her by a soft tap on her hand. Mercedes gave her a gentle smile, put a single finger to her lips, and took her hand, leading her quietly away from the distracted students. “Apologies for them...they mean well, but I understand such things can be overwhelming.” She said, her voice as soft as it’d always been.

Byleth gave her a warm smile. She’d always had a soft spot for Mercedes. “I appreciate it...Mercedes, was it?”

“Yes! If you ever need anything, please let me know. I would love to help out in any way I can.” She gave her signature angelic smile. Yes, Byleth remembered that smile well. Many times it was a comfort, but there were also the times when that smile masked a deep, helpless form of sadness.

Giving a smile of her own, Byleth thanked her and excused herself to continue wandering the grounds. Of course, her top priority was securing happiness for El, but her own happiness was important too, and like hell could she ever be happy without all her precious students being happy as well. She’d have to do a lot of planning to successfully pull it off, however. 

_ “We can plan later tonight, prepare for dinner for now.” _ Sothis chimed in.

“Yes…” Byleth answered aloud. Seeing her former students together all at once was sure to be overwhelming. She turned down a path she knew well. There was only one spot she felt like she could truly relax at Garreg Mach, after all those timelines. It was the only place that had remained untainted by bad memories. 

As the small, secluded sitting area came into view, a flash of white hair did as well. Byleth stopped abruptly, but she’d already been spotted. She swallowed as blue eyes locked onto lavender once again.

“Edelgard…”


End file.
